Setting the scene
Lessons on saying no and setting boundaries
Unwanted attention: boundaries lesson
Real moments. A few choices. Words that work.
Move toward people or staff and ask for help. Practice the moment in a short Surefoot lesson.
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You are at a busy campus event. Someone you do not know started talking to you, and you have already stepped back once.
Someone keeps standing too close and will not take the hint.
What helps most?
- Move toward people or staff and ask for help.
- Stay put and hope they leave.
Recommended
Move toward people or staff and ask for help.
Move toward people or staff and ask for help. A direct boundary is optional when it feels safe. Politeness, smiling or freezing never makes harassment your fault.
Your next step
Move toward people or staff and ask for help.
Words you can use
“Please stay with me. I need help.”
Sources: Right To Be
Questions about “Unwanted attention”
Why does moving toward other people or staff help in this situation?
Moving toward staff or a group helps because it puts you around others who can intervene or support you, reducing your isolation.
Source: Right To Be
How can I ask someone at the event for support in my own words?
You can get someone's support immediately by walking up to them or event staff and saying, "Please stay with me. I need help."
Source: Right To Be
What if I try to set a direct boundary and the person still ignores it?
If setting a direct boundary does not work or feels unsafe, immediately move toward event staff or a group of people to ask for help.
Source: Right To Be
Why should I avoid staying put and hoping the person just walks away?
Staying put and hoping someone leaves is not recommended because it keeps you isolated with the person ignoring your space, whereas seeking out staff or nearby people brings immediate support.
Source: Right To Be
Last updated October 11, 2026.